Rediscovering life and manhood after prostate cancer
I was diagnosed with prostate cancer at the end of 2019 and feared losing my manhood and my life. I was lucky to have my prostate surgically removed before the cancer spread more widely. The most minimal roadmap for recovery was provided. I want to expand the roadmap and the conversation about recovering life and manhood after prostate cancer.
Here, you can read a variety of survivor’s stories and those of their partners. There are lots of useful resources for your own journey. And this is not a substitute for professional medical advice.
The roots of this blog lie in the step by step sharing of my story as it unfolded over the last two and a half years, together with others who have different experiences. My aim is to mark some points on the rather uncharted landscape, so you can build your own roadmap. It includes direct and personal accounts of our body, head, heart and soul and partner journeys as well as the inner and outer resources that helped us along the way. Grateful thanks to my wife and an increasing number of other cancer survivors and their partners for sharing stories on these pages.
The goals: rebuild health, expand identities, make the most of what we have.
Before and after my surgery: three short videos
Get the lowdown in 5 minutes: click above for short, revealing videos before and after
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Journeys of recovery from – and adaptation to – prostate cancer
Below are the thumbnails of the most recent posts – click on each for the full story. For chronological order, please visit diagnosis, treatment and recovery pages. More here every week. I invite you to subscribe (see above and sidebar on the right/below) so you don’t miss a thing.
Brachytherapy side effects
by Trevor Pope I received a diagnosis of prostate cancer ten years ago, and it was treated with brachytherapy. The treatment was a success and the outcome is that my cancer is cured. That is, if cancer is ever really [...]
Guest post: my experience of brachytherapy
By Trevor Pope January 2022 marks ten years since my diagnosis and brachytherapy treatment for cancer of the prostate. As anybody who has been given a dread-disease diagnosis will tell you, this can be life changing, even life-ending. So it [...]
One year after prostate surgery
27 February 2021: A year after radical prostatectomy, I am so glad to be alive. I've also realised it is time to tell my story.* In this post and short video, I reflect on the many changes in my life. There's [...]
Day 351: Eagerness emerging in new ways
12 February 2021: Nearly a year after my radical prostatectomy, natural erections are visiting on a rare, fleeting and unpredictable basis. How much I miss the eagerness of this body part that used so frequently to pop up of its own [...]
Guest diary: On being diagnosed with prostate cancer
By Andre Sobolewski 3 June 2021: I've just been diagnosed with prostate cancer. I feel myself being transformed these past days. It's hard to feel an inner illness when I feel perfectly healthy: I can only understand it intellectually: Adenocarcinomas are [...]
Day 320 – Losing my virginity all over again aged 62
12 January 2021: Let me share some joy in difficult times: I feel like I have lost my virginity all over again! It has taken a lot of love and awkwardness to bring the ungainly vacuum erectile device (VED) into the [...]
Guest post: Getting over incontinence 8 years later
By GS, United Kingdom For seven years after my radical prostatectomy, incontinence was an ongoing problem. It turned out I was doing my Kegels wrong. Here's how learning to do pelvic floor exercises correctly made the difference, even after 8 [...]
Day 280: Open to outcomes, not attached to them
3 December 2020: Being open to outcomes allows people to address directions and issues that can't be nailed down with firm definitions. Reflecting on the year that's ending, I see that I am getting less attached to outcomes. This shift opens [...]
Guest post 3: External Beam Radiation Therapy
By Martin Wells After my radical prostatectomy didn’t catch all the cancer, I was prescribed 25 sessions of external beam radiation therapy (EBRT) and two and a half years of Androgen Deprivation Therapy (ADT). I call ADT chemical castration because [...]
Guest poem: Finding the NEW
by Steve Jones When I was diagnosed with prostate cancer in October, 2020 I was scared, apprehensive and anxious. I didn’t really listen all that intently to the numbers. As soon as I heard the word cancer I just wanted [...]
9 months: a masterclass in softer pleasures
25 November 2020: It's so good to get help with unavoidable sexual changes after prostate cancer. My wife and I love each other as much as ever, but the way we make love has to change as a result of my [...]
Day 270: The value of prostate cancer support groups
23 November 2020: After prostate cancer treatment, I felt isolated and uninformed while weird stuff continued to happen to my body. Now at last I am tapping into the value of prostate cancer support groups locally and globally. My first ideas [...]
Invitation to contribute
Your input is invited
- Please comment on individual blog entries and ask questions. You do need to give your valid email address (to avoid spam) and your contact info won’t be published or abused in any way. You are welcome to use a nickname or even “anonymous.”
- Use the Contact page to open up broader topics
- Consider sharing your story. Example 1 and example 2. Maybe your voice and story also belong here? Let me know or Try this template – you will be surprised how much you learn from telling your story (open to prostate cancer survivors and/or their partners)