Rediscovering life and manhood after prostate cancer
I was diagnosed with prostate cancer at the end of 2019 and feared losing my manhood and my life. I was lucky to have my prostate surgically removed before the cancer spread more widely. The most minimal roadmap for recovery was provided. I want to expand the roadmap and the conversation about recovering life and manhood after prostate cancer.
Here, in the blog you can read a variety of survivor’s stories and those of their partners. There are lots of useful resources for your own journey, including videos and my new book. And this is not a substitute for professional medical advice.
The roots of the blog below lie in the step by step sharing of my story as it unfolded over the last five years, together with others who have different experiences right up to the present day. My aim is to mark some points on the rather uncharted landscape, so you can build your own roadmap.
It includes direct and personal accounts of our body, head, heart and soul and partner journeys as well as the inner and outer resources that helped us along the way. Grateful thanks to my wife and an increasing number of other cancer survivors and their partners for sharing stories on these pages. They also helped inspire and inform the book featured on this page.
The goals: rebuild health, expand identities, make the most of what we have.
Before and after my surgery: short videos
Get the lowdown in minutes: click above for short, revealing videos before and after prostate cancer treatment
Journeys of recovery from – and adaptation to – prostate cancer
Below are the thumbnails of the most recent posts – click on each for the full story. For chronological order, please visit diagnosis, treatment and recovery pages. More here every week. I invite you to subscribe (see above and sidebar on the right/below) so you don’t miss a thing.
Partner diary 2: searching for support
By Catherine 8 December 2022: I want to contribute to support my partner after his cytoprostatectomy. It's nearly 4 months since his surgery, and we still can't have sex the way we used to. Here are some of the conversations, experiments [...]
Partner Diary 1: early days after cystoprostatectomy
By Catherine I'm a 59 year old French woman Professor of Medicine. My husband, who is 12 years older than me, had a cystoprostatectomy on 12 August 2022 due to (initially misdiagnosed) bladder cancer. The operation was on the 40th anniversary [...]
Recovering kundalini yoga after prostatectomy
When I first tried returning to yoga after prostatectomy, it was difficult. After the surgery, I was very conscious of having that empty space at my root chakra - where the prostate used to be. And when I tried to shift [...]
Guest post 2: Sexual inventiveness with ED and new partner
By Tim Flood I was lucky enough to fall in love and start a new relationship soon after my prostate cancer treatment. However, our first sexual encounter was a disaster. I could not achieve an erection. I was distraught. Devastated. Clearly, [...]
3 years in my new body
27 February 2023: My experience of life after prostate cancer: loss is inevitable. Adaptation and recovery are possible. This morning I am celebrating exactly 3 years since my radical prostatectomy. I have no regrets. I'm lucky that my cancer is still [...]
Guest post 1: Cancer runs in my family
By Tim Flood I am 60 years old. A very fit, healthy, non-smoking vegetarian. My father had prostate cancer and was treated by radiotherapy 13 years ago. He is cancer free. My younger brother also has prostate cancer. I was [...]
Guest post: Yearning for sex
By Anonymous I was 60 years old when diagnosed with prostate cancer and got radiotherapy treatment for 37 days and hormone suppression treatment (ADT) for 3 years. It felt like I was in a dream and that I was looking at [...]
Guest post 5: Men talking about sexual health
By Dr Rhys Leeming Men do talk if the conditions are right. It's not just me that is benefiting from communicating more openly about intimate and awkward subjects. Here's how a bunch of mates built on my experience to share some [...]
Day 951: Mini-peaks, alternatives to full orgasm
5 October 2022: Orgasms can get more elusive after prostate cancer treatment - or simply with aging. It's sometimes called by the fancy name anorgasmia. Prostate cancer support forums carry anguished laments from both partners about survivors not being able to [...]
Guest post “can’t believe how well I feel despite no testosterone”
By John It's 9 months since my orchiectomy in June 2022. So far I haven't had any reason to think that I made the wrong choice. I can't believe how well I feel despite no testosterone. For me the only [...]
Guest diary: Searing changes after prostate cancer
By Phoenix Rising [Editor's note: One man's story of physical, emotional and spiritual changes, losses and opportunities after prostate cancer treatment. Big thanks to the reader who shared just one month of his anonymous diary in all its searing honesty, searching [...]
Day 920: Libido returning
4 September 2022: After prostate cancer - and then an intense bout of Covid last month - my body is reawakening to the gift of returning libido. At the beginning of August I spent a week floating off the planet with [...]
Invitation to contribute
Your input is invited
- Please comment on individual blog entries and ask questions. You do need to give your valid email address (to avoid spam) and your contact info won’t be published or abused in any way. You are welcome to use a nickname or even “anonymous.”
- Use the Contact page to open up broader topics
- Consider sharing your story. Example 1 and example 2. Maybe your voice and story also belong here? Let me know or Try this template – you will be surprised how much you learn from telling your story (open to prostate cancer survivors and/or their partners)