Rediscovering life and manhood after prostate cancer
I was diagnosed with prostate cancer at the end of 2019 and feared losing my manhood and my life. I was lucky to have my prostate surgically removed before the cancer spread more widely. The most minimal roadmap for recovery was provided. I want to expand the roadmap and the conversation about recovering life and manhood after prostate cancer.
Here, you can read a variety of survivor’s stories and those of their partners. There are lots of useful resources for your own journey. And this is not a substitute for professional medical advice.
The roots of this blog lie in the step by step sharing of my story as it unfolded over the last two and a half years, together with others who have different experiences. My aim is to mark some points on the rather uncharted landscape, so you can build your own roadmap. It includes direct and personal accounts of our body, head, heart and soul and partner journeys as well as the inner and outer resources that helped us along the way. Grateful thanks to my wife and an increasing number of other cancer survivors and their partners for sharing stories on these pages.
The goals: rebuild health, expand identities, make the most of what we have.
Before and after my surgery: short videos
Get the lowdown in 5 minutes: click above for 5 short, revealing videos before and after
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Journeys of recovery from – and adaptation to – prostate cancer
Below are the thumbnails of the most recent posts – click on each for the full story. For chronological order, please visit diagnosis, treatment and recovery pages. More here every week. I invite you to subscribe (see above and sidebar on the right/below) so you don’t miss a thing.
Day 497: Non-surgical treatment for Peyronie’s disease
8 July 2021: Prostate cancer treatment increases risk of Peyronie's disease which leads to bent or misshapen erections. This is caused by the buildup of a hard knot or lump, known as plaque, in the membrane that surrounds the erectile tissues [...]
PSA rising after treatment: like snakes and ladders
My PSA has started to rise, 18 months after my prostate cancer treatment. Guest Post by Dr Rhys Leeming I’m beginning to see later life in general, and Prostate Cancer (PC) in particular, like a game of snakes and ladders. [...]
Day 423: Why is health care so splintered?
25 April 2021: Everybody agrees that integrated health care is the best way to address illness and enhance wellness. But actual prostate cancer care is divided into narrow splinters of excellence. That's what I and 99% of the prostate cancer [...]
Day 418: Energy changes after prostate cancer
20 April 2021: Losing my prostate has brought energy changes. It's also got me exploring where my energy really comes from. When I say "energy" I mean something less tangible than the literal physical energy we get from eating food [...]
Partner Story 3: what is “natural sex” for a woman
By Colleen Dawson Being a woman means that sex is inextricably linked to careful preparation. Spontaneity happens when the planning allows it. While many men are averse to anything "artificial" in their own sexual performance, I have always had to deal [...]
Day 417: Revealing interview: sexual recovery after prostate surgery
19 April 2021: I was interviewed today by my hero Dr Jo Milios and the wonderful Melissa Hadley Barrett. It was edgy to be so frank in telling the story of the first year of my sexual recovery after prostate cancer. [...]
Guest story: From trans-Africa travels to treatment shopping to peace
There are many options on being diagnosed with prostate cancer, and definitely one size doesn't fit all. Gavin Hartford was diagnosed with prostate cancer around the same time as me in 2019. Within days, he and his wife took off [...]
Guest post: I just wanted the cancer out!
By Paddy O'Brien Whatever my Gleason Score was, I forget. It is written down somewhere. When urologist Dr Moolman told me (in May 2017) that 75% of the needle biopsy samples from my prostate were cancerous, after a TURP op, [...]
Online course to navigate intimate connection after cancer
13 March 2021 (Day 380 after my surgery): This is about getting help with intimacy after cancer. I have a new body. For my wife it's about having a partner with a differently able body. How do we connect intimately? We [...]
Brachytherapy side effects
by Trevor Pope I received a diagnosis of prostate cancer ten years ago, and it was treated with brachytherapy. The treatment was a success and the outcome is that my cancer is cured. That is, if cancer is ever really [...]
Guest post: my experience of brachytherapy
By Trevor Pope January 2022 marks ten years since my diagnosis and brachytherapy treatment for cancer of the prostate. As anybody who has been given a dread-disease diagnosis will tell you, this can be life changing, even life-ending. So it [...]
One year after prostate surgery
27 February 2021: A year after radical prostatectomy, I am so glad to be alive. I've also realised it is time to tell my story.* In this post and short video, I reflect on the many changes in my life. There's [...]
Invitation to contribute
Your input is invited
- Please comment on individual blog entries and ask questions. You do need to give your valid email address (to avoid spam) and your contact info won’t be published or abused in any way. You are welcome to use a nickname or even “anonymous.”
- Use the Contact page to open up broader topics
- Consider sharing your story. Example 1 and example 2. Maybe your voice and story also belong here? Let me know or Try this template – you will be surprised how much you learn from telling your story (open to prostate cancer survivors and/or their partners)