Rediscovering life and manhood after prostate cancer
I was diagnosed with prostate cancer at the end of 2019 and feared losing my manhood and my life. I was lucky to have my prostate surgically removed before the cancer spread more widely. The most minimal roadmap for recovery was provided. I want to expand the roadmap and the conversation about recovering life and manhood after prostate cancer.
Step by step, this is to share my story as it unfolded over the last two years. My aim is to mark some points on the rather uncharted landscape, so you can build your own roadmap. It is a direct and personal account of my body, head, heart and soul journey as well as the inner and outer resources that helped me along the way. Grateful thanks to my wife and other cancer survivors for also sharing their stories on these pages.
The goal: rebuild health, expand identity as a man.
Before and after surgery: three short videos
Get the lowdown in 5 minutes: click above for short, revealing videos before and after
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Journeys of recovery from – and adaptation to – prostate cancer
Below are the thumbnails of the most recent posts – click on each for the full story. For chronological order, please visit diagnosis, treatment and recovery pages. More here every week. I invite you to subscribe (see above and sidebar on the right/below) so you don’t miss a thing.
Guest post: tracking nocturnal tumescence after prostatectomy
By Michael Ward Here's what I got when I tracked my involuntary nocturnal tumescence for the year after my radical prostatectomy. In plain language, that's "how hard was my morning wood." It was useful during my recovery because I didn't [...]
Guest post: PSA rising again – personal action
By Dr Rhys Leeming It’s a devastating moment when, after all your initial treatment and painful recovery and a seemingly miraculous cancer cure, you realise your prostate cancer has actually come back! It happened to me in April 2022. This [...]
The wobbly zone in my prostate cancer ED recovery map
15 August 2021: 18 months after surgery, my prostate cancer ED recovery is like our late winter weather: unsettled, hopeful, up and down. For the last month or two I thought my erectile dysfunction was over but it's not so solid [...]
Guest post: emotional impact of ADT
By Adrian When my prostate cancer came back in 2020, I had salvage radiation for six weeks and now I am on ADT hormone suppression treatment for three years. It has changed me big time. And it has motivated me [...]
Guest poem: Caught in a shock
By Wayne May Caught in a shock that interrupts routines Caught in a shock that interrupts routines life and death play tennis with my feelings. My body tries to respond and finds it’s not able Strangely [...]
Day 497: Non-surgical treatment for Peyronie’s disease
8 July 2021: Prostate cancer treatment increases risk of Peyronie's disease which leads to bent or misshapen erections. This is caused by the buildup of a hard knot or lump, known as plaque, in the membrane that surrounds the erectile tissues [...]
PSA rising after treatment: like snakes and ladders
My PSA has started to rise, 18 months after my prostate cancer treatment. Guest Post by Dr Rhys Leeming I’m beginning to see later life in general, and Prostate Cancer (PC) in particular, like a game of snakes and ladders. [...]
Day 423: Why is health care so splintered?
25 April 2021: Everybody agrees that integrated health care is the best way to address illness and enhance wellness. But actual prostate cancer care is divided into narrow splinters of excellence. That's what I and 99% of the prostate cancer [...]
Day 418: Energy changes after prostate cancer
20 April 2021: Losing my prostate has brought energy changes. It's also got me exploring where my energy really comes from. When I say "energy" I mean something less tangible than the literal physical energy we get from eating food [...]
Partner Story 3: what is “natural sex” for a woman
By Colleen Dawson Being a woman means that sex is inextricably linked to careful preparation. Spontaneity happens when the planning allows it. While many men are averse to anything "artificial" in their own sexual performance, I have always had to deal [...]
Day 417: Revealing interview: sexual recovery after prostate surgery
19 April 2021: I was interviewed today by my hero Dr Jo Milios and the wonderful Melissa Hadley Barrett. It was edgy to be so frank in telling the story of the first year of my sexual recovery after prostate cancer. [...]
Guest story: From trans-Africa travels to treatment shopping to peace
There are many options on being diagnosed with prostate cancer, and definitely one size doesn't fit all. Gavin Hartford was diagnosed with prostate cancer around the same time as me in 2019. Within days, he and his wife took off [...]
Invitation to contribute
Your input is invited
- Please comment on individual blog entries and ask questions. You do need to give your valid email address (to avoid spam) and your contact info won’t be published or abused in any way. You are welcome to use a nickname or even “anonymous.”
- Use the Contact page to open up broader topics
- Consider sharing your story. Example 1 and example 2. Maybe your voice and story also belong here? Let me know or Try this template – you will be surprised how much you learn from telling your story (open to prostate cancer survivors and/or their partners)