Rediscovering life and manhood after prostate cancer
I was diagnosed with prostate cancer at the end of 2019 and feared losing my manhood and my life. I was lucky to have my prostate surgically removed before the cancer spread more widely. The most minimal roadmap for recovery was provided. I want to expand the roadmap and the conversation about recovering life and manhood after prostate cancer.
Here, you can read a variety of survivor’s stories and those of their partners. There are lots of useful resources for your own journey. And this is not a substitute for professional medical advice.
The roots of this blog lie in the step by step sharing of my story as it unfolded over the last two and a half years, together with others who have different experiences. My aim is to mark some points on the rather uncharted landscape, so you can build your own roadmap. It includes direct and personal accounts of our body, head, heart and soul and partner journeys as well as the inner and outer resources that helped us along the way. Grateful thanks to my wife and an increasing number of other cancer survivors and their partners for sharing stories on these pages.
The goals: rebuild health, expand identities, make the most of what we have.
Before and after my surgery: short videos
Get the lowdown in 5 minutes: click above for 5 short, revealing videos before and after
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Journeys of recovery from – and adaptation to – prostate cancer
Below are the thumbnails of the most recent posts – click on each for the full story. For chronological order, please visit diagnosis, treatment and recovery pages. More here every week. I invite you to subscribe (see above and sidebar on the right/below) so you don’t miss a thing.
Guest post 5: Men talking about sexual health
By Dr Rhys Leeming Men do talk if the conditions are right. It's not just me that is benefiting from communicating more openly about intimate and awkward subjects. Here's how a bunch of mates built on my experience to share some [...]
Day 951: Mini-peaks, alternatives to full orgasm
5 October 2022: Orgasms can get more elusive after prostate cancer treatment - or simply with aging. It's sometimes called by the fancy name anorgasmia. Prostate cancer support forums carry anguished laments from both partners about survivors not being able to [...]
Guest post “can’t believe how well I feel despite no testosterone”
By John It's 9 months since my orchiectomy in June 2022. So far I haven't had any reason to think that I made the wrong choice. I can't believe how well I feel despite no testosterone. For me the only [...]
Guest diary: Searing changes after prostate cancer
By Phoenix Rising [Editor's note: One man's story of physical, emotional and spiritual changes, losses and opportunities after prostate cancer treatment. Big thanks to the reader who shared just one month of his anonymous diary in all its searing honesty, searching [...]
Day 920: Libido returning
4 September 2022: After prostate cancer - and then an intense bout of Covid last month - my body is reawakening to the gift of returning libido. At the beginning of August I spent a week floating off the planet with [...]
Day 907: Phantom erections
22 August 2022: What a relief to find I am not alone with the phenomenon of phantom erections! Today a fellow member posted the following in an online prostate cancer support group. He dreamed he had a full-on erection. Then he [...]
Day 877: Benefits of a modest boost in testosterone
23 July 2022, Victoria BC: My testosterone is back in the normal range. My PSA is still undetectable. And I am celebrating the benefits of a (modest) boost in testosterone. Today I ran my fastest 5 km since 2014! (26 minutes [...]
Day 750: Needing to pee and nowhere to go
18 March 2022: Two years after my prostatectomy, my urine control is quite good. Tonight it got a pressure test. It's always tough when you are away from home and need to pee. It gets tougher after prostate cancer surgery, because [...]
Two years on: how prostate cancer has softened me
27 February 2022: There is so much to be grateful for, two years after my radical prostatectomy. And there are losses and changes that continue to upset and confuse me. Beforehand, my urologist said cryptically "after I remove your prostate, you [...]
Day 716: Boosting testosterone after prostate cancer
12 February 2022: Today I started a course of treatment with the intention of naturally boosting my low testosterone after prostate cancer. It is important because testosterone is a miracle hormone (actually for both men and women.) It helps build and [...]
Guest post 2: orchidectomy as an ADT alternative
By John In June this year I chose to have my testicles surgically removed, as an alternative to a lifetime on Androgen Deprivation Therapy (ADT). In terms of my overall quality of life after orchidectomy, it is working better for [...]
Success with Viagra – 2 years after radical prostatectomy
13 December 2021 - While adapting to and celebrating the joys of softer sexuality, I also admit to pining for the return of hard erections. Drugs like Viagra and Cialis can help but it is complicated. Today I tried again with [...]
Invitation to contribute
Your input is invited
- Please comment on individual blog entries and ask questions. You do need to give your valid email address (to avoid spam) and your contact info won’t be published or abused in any way. You are welcome to use a nickname or even “anonymous.”
- Use the Contact page to open up broader topics
- Consider sharing your story. Example 1 and example 2. Maybe your voice and story also belong here? Let me know or Try this template – you will be surprised how much you learn from telling your story (open to prostate cancer survivors and/or their partners)